It's Life!

Relationships! .. They are the most integral part of every individual. He has many acquaintances each day. He has many relationships around his surroundings. How he deals with each of them depends on them. When a relationship starts it’s the most beautiful thing over on earth. As time passes by relationships have to face its share of lows and highs.
These relationships are so unpredictable. They are so weird. How they start, how they end we can’t even understand. We try to hold on these relationships but we fail. They have so many different shades. They show so many new perspectives of life which an individual cannot explore alone. When relations begin they bring so much satisfaction and excitement with them. They have to go through those phases that will test them. It’s like a fish taken out of water. The way it struggles for its life the same ways relationships have to face such instances where it is tested. Just like a living chicken is put on the stove to be cooked.. Relationships are put on fire. Whether it survives or it destroys or it gets stronger.. that depends on the strength and faith of the relationship. It depends on how much a person can have faith; it depends on the extent to which a person can trust himself and his relationships. It doesn’t work according to the way you plan it. Misunderstandings take the place of understanding. There is a feeling of fear to loose on the relationship, there is insecurity, there is no trust suddenly where once upon a time their was only trust.
Suddenly two individuals change, their attitudes change towards each other. I don’t say that a relation should remain the same as it is started all through its life. But I feel it’s necessary that people realize the worth of every relationship and acquaintance it makes in life. By crying for that relationship you are making it stronger, you are giving that relationship so much importance in your life that you have tears when it’s in trouble. At times relations just don’t work. At one point of time it ends. It doesn’t mean two people couldn’t get along. It just means that the relationship was not meant to be. Instead of suffering in future it makes you strong today. It’s important to get over such relations which are not meant to be. But I don’t understand that when they were not destined to continue then why did they start. May be because that relation had to teach you how to live. Maybe you had forgotten to smile and that relationship came like a power in your life and brought life within you. Since it was a power for a while, it had to leave and therefore it faded away out of your life and then we are left with complaining and regretting. Instead can’t we just learn out of it and thank the power that it taught us how to live instead of criticizing that it left.
Why relationships become our weakness? Why does it make us so weak that we can’t withstand life. Why does it affect a person’s behavior, a person’s life so much? Individuals always need support. They can survive alone. They need to live and to live strangers makes us feel so strong. That also affects us then obviously a long lasting relationship has to affect a person’s emotional balance. Emotionally a person becomes weak when he faces a low in any relationship in life. However strong he may be in every other aspect of life but when it comes to relationships he becomes the weakest. Infact that’s the only stage of life where every individual stands to be equal. Equal in the sense to be weak towards a relationship. It’s a feeling that everyone has to go through. A feeling where a person feels destroyed, helpless and devastated. He feels he is a looser and will never grow up in life. Just another person made so much of a difference in your life that you felt you are not worth anything in life. That’s the power in relationships. Little gestures and expressions of anger, dislike, distrust by one can ruin the day of another one. Why does such distrust come suddenly. Is it that there was never trust. It was just a mask over distrust or maybe it’s the other way round. Trust was the original face and Distrust wore the mask over trust.
We expect to work out relationships as per our condition. We feel we can set rules and limitations for it. We can make it or break it but it doesn’t work that way. Why do we criticize that we had to suffer so much in this relationship, instead cant we just move out and see the same relationship through a different perspective and see that we learnt so much more, we gained much more than loosing.
We set rules and principals but when they pass through the heart they all vanish because nothing can withstand infront of the heart. Afterall it’s only his heart that has the power to let us live then why live according to our brains. Instead live according to what your heart says. Why hold back emotions and analyze it, instead walk on the direction that your heart shows. It’s the heart that binds to strangers in a never ending relationship. It has so much power than why not go according to it!

Strange are these ways of life!
Leave things on fate and time when situations become out of control. But never to loose hope. You need to keep trying your effort on it.
Suddenly, life takes a U-Turn when you don’t even imagine thinking of it. It seems weird to accept what you expected once upon a time. Suddenly, something you always expected starts happening but that happens when you don’t expect it to happen. That’s what God does--- He brings sudden changes, sudden tensions and sudden stress relievers as well.
Life becomes stressful when it has to deal with tensions. And the next moment the tension goes off, the stress is also off-loaded. You are once again ready to face a new challenge.
When relations become stronger, expectations increase. With expectations, desires increase and when these expectations are not fulfilled, tension and stress arises. But we individuals never come out with our stress. We open up saying ‘I expect this from you’ or ‘I wish this comes true’; but when these expectations don’t come true, we never open up. We never say at that time or frankly say to the person that ‘I had expected this but maybe the expectation was too high’. This time, we assume things, perceive it in our way and keep it to ourselves. That’s where we are letting our relationship fall into trouble because we are not opening up our expectations that didn’t come true. By doing this we are not letting the person explain why he/she didn’t fulfill our expectation. Maybe the reason is completely different from what we assume and how we perceive but since we didn’t give a chance to open up ourselves, we created negative feelings in our mind. The tension area becomes fully occupied in mind. But the bottom-line remains same- that we are not ready to open up. We get scared that things will get worse but how will it and why will it?
By not opening up we are giving opportunities for the opposite person to assume things. That person might interpret the situation in a different way and that’s how a misunderstanding gets created. So the root remains that one expects something, that other does not or maybe could not fulfill that expectation. So that person now feels bad and assumes the reasons for his/her expectation not being fulfilled. But these assumptions, he does not confirm by opening up to the other person and because of the assumptions starts behaving in a weird manner with the other. On this changed behavior and attitude the other tries to interpret it in his way of perception; but even he doesn’t try to open up and state his interpretation. So no reason becomes a root reason for a stupid and senseless misunderstanding.
We are human beings. Because of our fear of the occurrence of misunderstandings, we cannot stop or limit our expectations because this is the human nature created by the power that rules individuals. The only thing we can do is not to assume things. Rather than assumptions, its better to confront and get over misunderstandings and misinterpretations. Until the ice doesn’t break, there is no chance that the relationship can get back to normal. It’s the only way relationships work!
Now when finally people open up to each other, they realize that whatever they wasted on assumptions and making wrong notions could have been saved to make the relationship stronger only if they had opened up to each other earlier.
After such misunderstandings, normally, relationships become normal. More of affection and caring happens towards each other. But this in turn develops more expectations and when this fairy tale dreams end, one realizes the truth of relationship. He faces through much more stress than the one before because this time the relationship had been much more intense. The same cycle of misunderstandings repeats!
Thus, it’s better to live in reality and have practical expectations.

Hi,

I begin my blog with a quote on my life -

"The Longest journey in my life is about 18 inches.. that is from your mind to your heart"

so.. I prefer not to travel soo much.. coz it just confuses life furthure..

I write straight from the heart and hence my blog is named.. "fromheart2pen"